“The drama in your life becomes your comfort zone and when you break out of it, whether it’s physically or mentally, it’s the unknown. And the unknown is scary.” That bit of wisdom comes from 2x Academy Award winner Hilary Swank in her interview with podcast host, Tom Bilyeu of Impact Theory. Tune in for more of her success secrets on mindset, getting out of your own way and the importance of surrounding yourself with people you can trust.
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To be honest I wasn’t a big fan of Hillary Swank before listening to this podcast, and I didn’t know much about her but I definitely have a new appreciation for her and her work. She is someone you might think of when you hear the term lady boss. Or, what I like to call a “lady badass” but you do you. Like the rest of us, she only has 24 hours in a day but it’s what she does with those 24 hours is what sets her apart. Not only has she used them to create a long and successful career in acting and directing but she also started a non profit as well as her own clothing line. I know what you’re thinking, she’s rich and famous so of course she can do all that. But what if she’s rich and famous BECAUSE she does all that? I think It’s inspiring to see what’s truly possible and just how much we’re capable of. Because if she’s out there doing it, it proves it can be done. And if it can be done then I can do it and so can you!
The clip I’m about to share has a lot about mindset. Listen to how Hilary’s has helped her not only persevere but overcome potential obstacles throughout both her personal and professional life that might have stopped many of us in our tracks. Hearing her story, it’s no mystery as to how she’s gotten to where she is, but It’s impressive just how far hard work, courage and determination can take a person in creating the life they want, regardless of money, talent or inherent abilities. My hope is that you’re able to take something from her narrative that resonates with you and apply it in your own pursuits, as I intend to. In my case, it’s the idea of grace under pressure. Something you’ll hear more on when Hilary talks about a phobia she had on set. But when I’m struggling and others around me are not, it’s giving myself the permission to be okay with that. Huge for someone who hates feeling like the weak link or the center of attention. Just let me sit in the back of the room, not make waves, not cause any trouble...you get the idea.
Now that you know I hate being the center of attention and I’ve done my very best to avoid it and pretty successfully. I’m going to tell you a secret... that I know many others have as well. I’m my own worst critic, and by staying small and holding back I felt I could avoid the inevitability of disappointment and failure. I played it safe and did my best to avoid those uncomfortable negative emotions. Unfortunately I was also cutting myself off from the positive ones that come with challenging myself, trying new things and overcoming my struggles. I was keeping myself from the person I could become on the other side. Living half a life by avoiding the parts I was scared of. What the hell was I thinking? I guess, you don’t know what you don’t know.
I finally woke up and decided it was time to do something about this. So I dove head first into the one thing that scared the shit out of me...acting. AND IT WAS AMAZING! Not really, it was TERRIFYING! When I say terrifying I mean, profusely sweating, red face, stammering, clammy hands, sick to my stomach terrifying. I HATED IT! Not because of what it was but because of who I was. Oh, and I was awful at it. I mean God awful. But, I came back. And I kept coming back, even when I was told, in front of the whole class, “Tracy, that sucked, have a seat”. No lie! If you’ve never been to an acting class, let me enlighten you. The coach gives you some direction, you have about 2 minutes to create a scene, literally off the top of your head, with another person, or sometimes on your own and you decide who you are, include the direction given, could be to portray a certain emotion, could be something else thrown in at the last second. Sometimes, you don’t even get time to prepare. You just get up on stage with someone and wing it. It’s... challenging. One of the MANY fails I had was when my partner and I did a scene about a health inspector coming to a dirty restaurant we worked at and I won’t bore you like we did the class but you get the idea. It was no good. But I kept at it and eventually overcame my fear of being judged, well maybe overcame is a tad strong, let’s just say I got comfortable being uncomfortable. Now I can take some of that courage amongst the other life lessons acting can teach you, of which there are many, into different areas of my life where I want to succeed. But was always afraid to. I’m also getting better at a skill I felt completely incompetent at and at the ripe old age of 46 when it’s said that it’s too difficult to learn new things as you get older, the whole can’t teach a dog new tricks saying, proving that theory is absolute garbage.
A few questions that might be helpful to ask yourself while listening to Tom and Hilary’s conversation is, do you think it’s possible to change your mindset? What are some of the limiting beliefs you have about yourself around money, relationships, career and purpose? Have you ever written them down to see exactly what they are and if they still feel true? Or are they stories you’ve been telling yourself for so long that they’ve become less truth and more habit?
I’m a podcast and online course junkie and at this very moment I am taking a money mindset class from long time coach and podcast host, Sean Croxton, whom I’ve been following for a number of years. One of our homework assignments for this class is to list the beliefs or money memories we have about money along with our financial goals for the future. A general goal and the reason I’m taking the course is to have an abundant income. I’m sure I’m not alone in this. But one of my beliefs is that people will think I’m greedy and selfish if I do. No clue why I feel that way but there it is. Obviously there’s a conflict between my beliefs and my goal. How can I have an abundant income when deep down I think people will judge me as greedy and selfish? I can’t, I won’t. I would be contradicting myself. And the brain doesn’t like contradictions. How many of us have a trail of broken New Year’s promises in our past because subconsciously we couldn’t reconcile what we wanted with what we believed. Which meant, in my case my mindset has to shift. And that’s where Sean’s Money Mindset Academy course came in. I’m not saying it’s been easy, I’m just saying it’s possible. And that’s enough for me...for now.
That’s it for me! If you like what you heard here then go back and check out the full episode #188, “Hilary Swank on Becoming a Beast Competitor in Work and Life” on the “Impact Theory” podcast. Links to that and both Tom and Hillary’s social media are included in the show notes below as well as a link to Sean Croxton’s website in case you’d like to learn more about his Money Mindset Academy Course.
If you enjoyed today’s show please share with someone you think might benefit and until next time, Thanks for listening.